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Thursday, September 04, 2008

 

Live Blogging the McCain Speech

Because someone ought to watch him ...

Live blogging John McCain's address to the Republican National Convention 2008.

19:06 PM — The get-to-know you video plays ...

19:10 PM — "What a life ... what a faith ... what a family ... The stars are aligned ... change will come ..." Wait a second. Is this a pro-McCain video, or one of those Obamarama "The One" commercials? Wait, now ... "Law And Order" ... Erm ... Is that Fred Thompson's voice?

19:14 PM — Charlie Gibson loves to point out that John McCain actually flew COACH class a year ago. The guy was a POW. He can handle COACH.

19:17 PM — McCain tried to get the money out of politics ... and yet he speaks before a green screen ... Uh ... HELLO ... PRODUCERS!

19:18 PM — Less than four minutes and a 9/11 reference. Not even Rudy got to it so fast.

19:19 PM — Footage of John McCain's 6th house is mysteriously projected on screen for no apparent reason. (Not sure which house it was actually ... but ... what's up with the house?)

19:23 PM — A word to Sen. Obama and his supporters ... "You have my respect and my admiration, despite our differences, much more unites us than divides us ..." Whoa ... what's up ... (some sort of disturbance on the floor ... a woman flailing her arms ... a struggle) fight fight fight .... So much for that KUMBAYA moment ... and now McCain gets his OZ moment: Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain ... with the uh purple dress on and the ... stuff they're yellin' o'er there ...

19:25 PM — Ten minutes in and we finally get to see Sara Palin's jawline.

19:27 PM — Sarah Palin knows what it's like to make a mortgage payment ... (Not sure how far he might want to go with that one right now.)

19:28 PM — Lots of emphasis on "I work for you" type statements about himself and Palin ... which begs the question who it is that's confused about for whom who they're working. Bush? Obama?

19:34 PM — "I'd rather lose an election than see my country lose a war ... I fight for Americans ... I fight for you ... I fight for ..." some family you never heard of in Michigan ... Why do politicians do this? It's what Ernie Harwell used to do calling Detroit Tiger baseball when he'd claim to know the life's story of the guy who caught the foul ball in the stands, but it's just silly in politics ... That ball was caught by little Jimmy Olstein from Warren, Mich. He had four cavities filled at the dentist today and that ball's gonna put a smile on his little face tonight ...

19:37 PM — We're all God's children and we're all Americans ... (Just don't tell Tom Tancredo I said that.)

19:39 PM — A bureaucrat standing between you and your doctor ... is apparently worse than the guy standing there now ... an HMO executive whose year-end bonus is based on how many claims they can bounce ...

19:41 PM — Can we just pause for a moment to admire that angel-like glow of white hair on John McCain's head? ... Is that hair paint? ... Reminds me of a line from Frank Baker (of "The Fabulous Baker Boys"), who said: "No, it's a magical sheath that simulates a dazzling head of hair."

19:44 PM — We're going to stop sending money to countries that don't like us very much? Uh oh ... France is screwed.

19:47 PM — "It's time for us to show the world again how Americans lead ..." ... ... ... Cue the Russia quote

19:48 PM — There we go ... Russia ... an enemy we can all understand. They wear uniforms. They drive tanks. Phew.

19:50 PM — Vietnam ... "I hate war. It's terrible beyond imagination. I'm running for president to keep the country I love safe ..." So, basically, we gotta keep him healthy because, well, otherwise ... We'll be building some really big recreation complexes instead, with some bitchin' ice hockey rinks, of course.

19:55 PM — Two broken arms ... a broken leg ... an angry crowd ... a cell ... Bush voters from 2000, this is where you flagellate yourselves.

20:00 PM — And all the east-coast affiliates break away ...

20:02 PM — "... teach an illiterate adult to read" ... but for God's sake, don't teach them to read the damn New York Times.

20:04 PM — Fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... fight ... Thank you

20:05 PM — God help me, I love the way that man winks and does the thumbs-up thing.

20:07 PM — No sign of Trig ... By the way ... Overheard today at the Century City Mall ... "What they give that baby that keep him from cryin' that whole time? Not once, girl. Not once! That ain't like no baby I've ever seen." Editors Note: I'm not saying they gave Trig anything. I'm just saying ... what'd they give that baby?

20:10 PM — There's Trig ... and he's ... asleep.

20:11 PM — Charlie Gibson just really loves it when balloons fall from ceilings ... wow ... The speech was THAT stirring huh?

20:13 PM — Sixty days left until the election ... and yeah ... there'll be debates but ... all anyone really cares about is that "Biden Vs. Palin" bout! Are you ready to rumblllllllllleeeeeeeee.

Good night and good luck.

Click to e-mail TJ Sullivan in LA
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1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shout-out to live-blogger T.J. Sullivan from a deserted press row inside the Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul, Minn.

-- News Hole

Thursday, September 4, 2008 10:06:00 PM PDT  

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